Ten Principles for Being a Real Man: A Call for Respect and Accountability

One. Learn to behave like a vase man. Every time the spotlight is on her(s), do whatever it takes to make her shine up. I mean, don’t do anything. Zero shadows: don’t get in the shot, don’t interrupt. Be polite.

Withdraw without withdrawing your attention. It’s their time, not yours. You are not more important. Take a step back and bask in your happiness.

Of the. Always respect their space (and their spaces), even more so when you have a hierarchical position of power. Do what’s right, be right.

No euphoric state justifies impoliteness. Internalizing that principle entails assuming, of course, that no episode of anger or rage legitimizes you to act like an animal..

Three. Listen to anyone who tells you that you may have acted inappropriately. Being a real man consists (among many other things) in knowing that one cannot always be right, that listening is necessary and that the discomfort generated should never be underestimated, be empathic.

It could be your mother, it could be your sister, it could be your partner and it could also be your daughter.

Four. Apologize immediately: Take full responsibility, with no nuances and no excuses. Be straight. Blaming the woman who feels assaulted or abused is very demeaning for her, but also for you (even if you are the least of it).

No alibi is admissible, all increase the damage you have caused and reduce your honor to rubble. Even more so when the profile is public and there is an obligation not to set a bad example.

Five. Always keep in mind that only a wretch victimizes himself. Be whole. This resource, so typical of the violent aggressor, so rudely narcissistic, shows that you have not understood anything, that you do not feel concerned about what happened and that, as a consequence, you may commit a similar mistake in the future.

Six. Never resort to any kind of diversionary maneuver. Your case is your case. If you are an adult to make your mistake, you are also an adult not to dilute your guilt. Be fair.

Of course, feminism is not living its best moment, but this evidence does not make machismo any less despicable and, needless to say, it does not provide a certificate of impunity for committing macho acts.

Attacking feminists to normalize abuse encourages the worst violence and that deserves unequivocal social repudiation.

Seven. No hiding behind anyone. Not with the subordinates, less with the couple and, of course, never after the daughters. Doing it is not clean, it is not decent and it will bring bills in the future.

The first apology is due to the victim and the second, to all the women who accompany you. Put to genitalize, the true balls are shown when facing adversity with a minimum of dignity. Be brave.

Eight. Try to understand that manhood is about protecting and that machismo causes the exact opposite, suffering. be thoughtful. If you can only offer an egotistical manual of resistance to your environment, your organization and your country, you are a defeated and destructive type. Be generous.

If nothing matters more to you than your ass, you can’t conceive of the damage you’re generating around you, you can’t realize that you’ve become a problem and you can’t detect that your salvation has already become impossible, so you’ll dig deeper.

Nine: integrity is demonstrated by raising one’s voice in the face of any aggression, especially in the face of abuse of power and, above all, when the person who breaks the silence is downstairs.

Always be accomplices of courageous women and encourage others. We have to accompany them all, shoulder to shoulder but one step behind. There are few players who have shown the essential solidarity that their teammates deserve, they do have manhood. Everyone else, including everyone on my team, has yet to learn many of the most valuable things in life.

Ten: Manhood is demonstrated by pushing away the man who behaves disrespectfully. be honest. Looking the other way, laughing at the joke, celebrating or applauding the unacceptable implies acting in a herd mode and that reduces man to the level of a sheep.

It is the image left by the assembly of Spanish football and those foundations must be changed. Calculating money, compromising, letting yourself be subjugated by a superior without moral authority, implies sinking into the deepest and most irreparable poverty. You will forever be slaves. No one can be free if you don’t defend the freedom of women.

It’s a shame to have to tell it at this point. Let’s see if at least our children manage to internalize what our mothers wanted to transmit to us. I am writing this so that mine can read it and know, tomorrow, how to behave like a real man.