struck down world record

I've been carrying a head statistic for years. On Friday, if my data is correct, an all-time record was broken. Because it is national, I also consider it a world record, which adds even more relevance to the accredited brand and to my hard-working and long-standing observation.. I raise the rank of achievement accrediting the supremacy of our country in the discipline analyzed from certain knowledge of comparative counting. Limited to a few countries, it is true, the sampling that my cross-border work has forced me to do allows for some extrapolation and sufficient statistical basis to affirm it.. I have not resisted emphasizing it, although this presumptuous observation could have been avoided, known to all of the long tradition and deep roots that the practice to which I profess such sincere devotion has in our country..

From the joy of finding to the most absolute disappointment mediated an hour and a call. The twenty minutes following the verification of the data – I reviewed it more than three times between nervousness and euphoria – I had to invest in finding the correct telephone number with which to contact and communicate.. The solutions on the Guinness Book of Records website, emails, forms, etc., did not inspire me immediately.. Determined as I was to share the enormous brand as soon as possible with all my peers, I refused to calculate the cost of the six minutes of waiting for an international call that it took me to get a last-generation human voice or trompe l'oeil to answer me.. I bit back a cry of joy when I identified the Latin accent of the fourth or fifth “can i help you?”. And I improved my already deteriorated state of mind at the expectation of more fluid communication as we slipped almost unconsciously into Spanglish forced by my stammering English and the mother tongue of the helpful telephone operator, finally human..

The empathy of the operator, the first few minutes are always good, it appeased some anxiety and allowed the organization of the ideas, the data, the structure of the request that I was carrying out with such enthusiasm. When he abandoned his vocation of service to ratify the denial of my request, I completely renounced Anglo-Saxon words and in a rather pure tone I made him aware of his mistake.. “Look again, miss,” I blurted out at minute 12 of our conversation.. His “no”, in perfect Peruvian, suddenly exposed my phone to its first gliding. Content the launch and prolonged the challenging silence of the well-trained operator, I decided to take on the frustration. Not before, of course, letting my interlocutor know the harshness of my opinion on the current system of registration of trademarks, achievements and records of which they have maintained a monopoly for too long and without competition control.. I shouldn't have broken the record for expletives by abruptly cutting off communication, so I didn't repeat the call. I attribute, for what I relate below, more to human action than to a failure of technology, the causes of the sudden termination.

The argument presented in such a recalcitrant way by “Flor María attends you” was so simple that its forcefulness offended. “That it was not listed in any category,” he told me in a repetitive and idiomatically mixed way.. “Impossible is nothing”, I would answer using advertising jargon, a source of great inspiration in my approaches to Shakespeare's language.. “How is there not going to be a category where you can register a mark of such caliber on labor absenteeism at public administration headquarters?” I blurted out with an altered voice and without a trace of Anglicisms.. “Sorry”, he answered three times. My response, in a more demanding tone, in the sense that I shouldn't feel it and keep looking, found a desperate man back from the Atlantic Ocean: “No, I'm sorry! I don't understand you!! “, again in perfect Peruvian, although this time with a certain accent from when they are touching your eggs.

As a result of my extensive experience with telemarketers of all kinds, especially those of Jazztel, I redirected my strategy towards more constructive and practical positions.. Pulling the catechizing intonation that was embedded in my childish brain and with all the teaching abilities at my disposal, which by the result should not be many, I set out to give a sufficiently convincing explanation..

I began by explaining to him that my future work leads me to the recurring visit of certain administrations. That we define administrations as the set of civil servants —career or interim— and labor personnel —permanent or temporary— hired by a public body and under a complex and advantageous Basic Statute of Public Employment. That we could add to the voluminous body of the Administration a significant number of freely appointed personnel to carry out different responsibilities, among which the figure of the adviser stands out.. The sum is already close to the figure of three million. This army willing to serve the administered performs its work in an unapproachable set of agencies and delegations. The data speaks of ten thousand different administrations. And yes, we only speak in Spain.

I continued reflecting on the patient Flor Mari —I already gained some confidence— that I have not visited all of them, but I have visited a few. That I keep an unconscious count, and due to my unavoidable condition, of the tables occupied every time a problem leads me to faithfulness and the risk of trying to solve it under public supervision, every time a rule is in contradiction, every time the Reading an article remembers scenes from the Marx Brothers… come on, I go a lot. That I reduce the numerical data to percentage to maintain the comparison between the three basic levels that the administration has. That both the national, the regional and the municipal compete closely on the podium of my mind throughout these years with the same courage and professionalism that Fernando Alonso shows. But instead of competing to be faster, they all seem to be competing to continue breaking records for absenteeism..

And I finally explained to him that, for the first time in my life, visiting four consecutive floors in search of the office of an official who was waiting for me —he was hiding from me, I came to think— inside the labyrinth of an organization of major relevance threw a unexpected full. 100% empty chairs, tables with no elbows on, computers focused on saving their screens. Not a single visible human, not a trace of public service, not even a comforting old-fashioned: “Come back tomorrow.”.

I was not able to tell the long-suffering Flor Mari the name of the organism, so I do not see its identification as coherent now.. After all, when I discovered the office, with joy comparable to that felt by illustrious people like Colón or Neil Armstrong, I also realized that there was no one there.. My obligation not to sign with a pseudonym, together with my obligation to return, curtails my ability to report. fear of being struck down. The “come back tomorrow” thing I had no choice but to blurt it out to the mirror.